Humor Quotes

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

I am an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way.

The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.

The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

I have a simple philosophy: Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches.

I am an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way.

The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.

The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.