I went to the doctor and told him I felt like a pair of curtains.

This joke is a masterclass in wordplay, specifically a pun that hinges on a common idiom. The humor blossoms from the doctor's clever, unexpected response to a rather peculiar patient complaint. When someone says they "feel like a pair of curtains," it's an absurd, metaphorical statement. The punchline, "He told me to pull myself together," brilliantly twists this. It's a literal instruction for curtains, but also a well-known idiom meaning to calm down and regain composure. The juxtaposition of the patient's odd feeling with the doctor's perfectly tailored (and pun-filled) advice is what makes it so amusing.

The phrase "pull yourself together" is a staple in the English language, often used to tell someone to stop being emotional or disorganized. Doctors, in their professional capacity, are expected to offer remedies and advice. This joke playfully subverts that expectation by having the doctor respond not with medical wisdom, but with a quick, witty retort that acknowledges the patient's bizarre analogy. It’s a classic example of how a simple turn of phrase can create a laugh, turning an otherwise serious situation into a moment of delightful silliness.