I told my travel buddy, 'Let's go to a beach town.' We went. The beach was a parking lot with a sign that said 'BEACH 200 YARDS.' We walked 200 yards. The beach was a rocky shore. The water was the color of a dish that hadn't been washed in three days. There was one seagull. The seagull was eating a french fry. We sat on a bench. My buddy said, 'You can really feel the ocean.'