51

I walked into a bar and said, 'I'll have whatever you'd order for a friend who's been crying in the parking lot for twenty minutes.' The bartender poured me a glass of water and said, 'You're in the wrong place.'

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84

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, 'Why the long face?'

84

A bear walks into a bar and says, 'I'll have a gin and...... tonic.'

83

I walked into a bar and asked for a drink that would make me feel like I'm on vacation.

83

I walked into a bar and asked if they had any drinks that could make me feel like a million bucks.

82

I went to a comedy bar where the audience was made up entirely of accountants.

81

Two WiFi routers got married at a bar.