79

I walked into a bar and said, 'I'll have a drink that tastes like the moment you finally sit down at the restaurant, the waiter says Can I get you started, and you realize you left your phone — and your reservation confirmation — at home.'

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76

I walked into a bar and said, 'Give me a drink that tastes like the moment you're at a restaurant, you've just said I'll have the water please, and the waiter writes down sparkling.'

42

I walked into a bar and said, 'I'll have a drink that tastes like the moment you realize you left the stove on.' The bartender poured me a whiskey and said, 'You want something smoky, or something that makes you want to run outside and check?'

22

I walked into a bar and said, 'Give me a drink that tastes like the moment you're in the cereal aisle, you've been there forty-five minutes, you've picked up every box, put it back, picked it up again, and the person behind you has been standing in silence so long you can hear their internal monologue.'

0

I walked into a bar and said, "Give me a drink that tastes like the moment you're at a networking event, you've been standing in a corner holding a cocktail you don't want, you've said 'What do you do?' to four different people, and the fifth one says 'Oh, you're in marketing?' and suddenly your cocktail is the only reason you're still standing there."

0

I walked into a bar and said, 'Give me a drink that tastes like the moment you're at a group project presentation, you're the one who actually did all the work, and the person who contributed nothing is standing at the front saying, So, as you can see here, while pointing at a slide you made, and your drink is the only thing in the room that knows the truth.'

0

I walked into a bar and said, 'Give me a drink that tastes like the moment you're at a restaurant, you finally get your food, you take a bite, and the waiter walks up and says, Is everything okay?'